A Valentine’s Day Misadventure

I awoke this morning to the sounds of sirens and reports of freezing rain. I guess I haven’t been paying close enough attention to the weather forecast… For some reason I didn’t think the bad weather was coming until tomorrow, so I figured I’d have some time today to run to the grocery store and wrestle through the people around me who are frantically doing their best to leave all the areas that contain milk, eggs, and bread looking like the toilet paper aisles last March. After years of living in the South and making fun of southerners for apocalypse-prepping at the mere mention of snow, I looked in my kitchen and saw that I had five eggs, half an inch of milk, and NO BREAD.

I really had no desire to go out in the cold, and neighborhood Facebook pages told tales of icy roads. But I figured the next few days were only going to get worse, so I decided to brave it (I grew up in Michigan, thinking that people in the South were morons when it came to driving on snowy roads, but I LEARNED VERY QUICKLY that snow and ice in Tennessee were not to be taken lightly). It’s 25 degrees out, and there was a misty rain outside — perfect freezing rain conditions. The fact that my feet were sliding around on my driveway and my car was frozen shut were not good signs, but I figured I’d just test out the neighborhood roads, and if it was too bad, I could decide not to go.

After chiseling my way into the car, starting it, and letting it idle for about 15 minutes to melt the thin layer of ice coating the windows, I traction-control-warninged my way up the hill out of my neighborhood. I was sliding around a little bit, but I thought I could make it. I decided to drive to Walmart. I know, I know… But I needed some new razors, and I’m not paying Kroger prices for razors. I’m not made of money. As I drove up and looked for a parking spot that wasn’t a country mile away from the store, there was a man walking his cart to his car while carrying a giant bouquet of about 20 helium-filled Valentine’s Day balloons. It was embarrassingly big. I wondered to myself who would want that to receive that many balloons as a Valentine… Scoffing at the weird gesture. I don’t know. Maybe he was going to resell them? Anyway, as he loaded his groceries into his SUV, he let go of the balloons, and within moments they were a distant red mylar romantic gesture in the hazy, icy sky. A part of me — the part that is even more frustratedly aware of pandemic loneliness at this time of year — giggled just a bit as he watched them disappear. I felt a little bad for him, so I was going to offer for him to video me telling his Valentine how nice the balloons were before they floated away… But then he didn’t return his cart to the corral that was ten yards away, so I figured he had it coming.

He had enough balloons that a smaller man would have been lifted off the ground…

I ice skated across the parking lot and into the store, where the few staples I was going to buy turned into a half-full cart. As I walked to the checkout, I realized I left home without my wallet. So, SO dumb. Somewhere, the Balloon guy was snickering. I tried to figure out if there was some way to have them ring the stuff up, and then I could call them with my credit card info? That wasn’t going to work. I figured I would leave the cart near the greeter… But should I take the ice cream all the way back to the frozen food section? My tired legs said no. I’d just hustle home, come right back, and pay. I slid back to my car and went home for my wallet. There was a car that was just abandoned in the middle of the road, so other people didn’t know if they were going to be able to make it up the hill (Nashville is way hillier than people think). I pulled around a skeptical Jeep. I didn’t care… My ice cream was MELTING. I made it back to the parking lot, parked a country mile away, grabbed my half-full cart, and made my way to the checkout. There were about three aisles open, and each of them had at least half a dozen milk, egg, & bread-filled carts lined up… So I made the decision to go through the self-scan. I know, I know… But my ice cream was MELTING, PEOPLE!

I scanned the bag of grapes, and it told me I needed assistance. The lady came over and commenced pushing button after unnecessary button, until it was literally asking for my I.D. in order to purchase cigarettes (I was definitely not buying cigarettes). The lady looked me up and down, and she pushed the button that said I was over 18. Some other screen came up with something that looked like launch codes… It was a circus. It felt like the scene when Mr. Bean took forever gift wrapping the necklace in Love Actually. Then she had to unlock the high security casing for my razors, and apparently the key was somewhere in the frozen food section. This lady did NOT care about my melting ice cream.

I finally got through, and I shuffled my way back to my car, using the cart as a steadying walker of sorts. And as I packed the groceries into my trunk, I heard a crash. The giant jar of pickles I just bought broke through the earth-killing bag I had put it in. I felt a wave of pickle juice wash over my green shoes. I was soaked. Pickles and glass were everywhere. I looked behind me, expecting to see the balloon guy standing there, smiling… middle fingers extended.

I trudged back into the store for a THIRD time this morning. At least this time my glassy, brine-soaked feet seemed to get a better grip on what was, by that point, black ice. I walked to the pickle aisle, past people who were looking around trying to figure out where that pickle smell was coming from. I grabbed a replacement jar of pickles, and I headed to customer service to tell them that the parking lot was covered in pickles and glass. I thought to myself that “Pickles & Glass” sounds like name of a Vaudeville duo. Turns out that the customer service area is closed on Valentine’s Day, I guess? I found an employee, told her about the Pickles & Glass duo idea, and told her I’m taking the replacement jar. She looked at my face and saw the eyes of a broken, pickle juice-covered man. It was about as non-romantic as holidays get…

If you can figure out what the moral of this story is, please write it in the comments… Because I can’t figure it out. Also, if you’d love the stuff I write and you’d like to become a Patron, you can DO THAT HERE. If you’d like to leave a tip, you can DO THAT ON PAYPAL, or you can Venmo your generosity to “chris-boeskool”. Please follow me ON TWITTER and ON FACEBOOK for more romantic stories. Happy Valentine’s Day!

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The Case For Impeaching Him Again

I’m not trying to preach to the choir here… I’m really not. By a large margin, most Americans understand that trump is a horrible, broken, evil person, and the nation will be better off without him. But I’ve seen people who are worried that impeaching him again would be too “divisive,” and we need to “come together.” There are calls for “unity.” But I’m not really concerned with those folks… If you can’t understand that “unity” with the people who supported an armed insurrection, who set up gallows outside of the Capitol and chanted “Hang Mike Pence,” who smeared their poop on the wall of the Capitol, who brought in pipe bombs, zip ties, & killed a Capitol Police officer by beating his head with a fire extinguisher is not what this country needs right now, chances are good there is nothing anyone is going to say to change your mind. You can’t reason someone out of not being reasonable. Besides, most of the people talking about “coming together” for the sake of the country are the same folks who lied about election results and supported objecting to the certification of President Elect Joe Biden’s victory… And there are few things less unifying to a country than spreading baseless claims about “election fraud.”

As Deontée Gordon said, “Well played, December 37th, 2020. Well played.”

I’m writing more to those who might be leaning towards the “What’s the point — He’s leaving in 10 days” side of things. There are many good reasons to impeach him again. I’m only going to write about a few…

Four days ago, donald trump stood behind bullet proof glass and stoked the anger of a giant crowd of his supporters. He restated the false claim that the election was “stolen from you and from me,” and he directed the crowd to march to the Capitol… Even though far-right corners of the internet had been calling for and planning a storming of the Capitol on Jan. 6 to “Stop the Steal” for over a month. Rudy Giuliani spoke at the rally and called for a “trial by combat.His voice was one of MANY republican voices who incited violence, and then got all “This is not who we are” when people took him seriously…

We see this all over the GOP. Like North Carolina Rep. Madison Cawthorn, who sounded like William Wallace giving a speech to the troops before battle, just to change his tune after the coup was unsuccessful…

“Yes, I’ve been pouring gasoline all over this church and handing people matches… But now that it’s on fire, I need want to go on record as CONDEMNING setting churches on fire. THIS IS NOT WHO WE ARE!”

But trump’s actions were much, MUCH worse. He repeated called for the crowd to “fight,” told them our country is “under siege,” and that they’ll “never take back the country with weakness.” He said, “You must stop the steal. You better do it before we have no country left,” calling Joe Biden an “illegitimate president.” And then he watched the violence on a TV screen. Watch this amazing, disturbing video…

As violence erupted, he was pressured by republicans to say something to call off his CoupKluxKlan members… So what he did was post a video — again lying about the election being stolen — and asked his MAGA Militia to go home, telling them “We love you. You’re very special,” (giving the red-hatted terrorists more affirmation than he’s ever given his actual children).

By itself, this is more than enough to remove a president. But what happened next shows just how much this scared, angry little man wanted this terrorist attack on the Capitol to be successful. The next THREE people in line for the presidency were all in that building that was being attacked. Trump knew that Mike Pence was going to fulfill his constitutional obligation to certify Biden’s election that day, but he WAITED until AFTER the terrorists were inside the building to send a tweet attacking Mike Pence for going against him. Republican Senator Ben Sasse said, “Today, the United States Capitol — the world’s greatest symbol of self-government — was ransacked while the leader of the free world cowered behind his keyboard — tweeting against his Vice President for fulfilling the duties of his oath to the Constitution.

News about the attack on the Capitol spread quickly, and Maryland Governor Larry Hogan — A REPUBLICAN — mobilized 200 state troopers to help, and he directed the General in charge of Maryland’s National Guard to get his troops ready. He said that “House Majority Leader Steny Hoyer, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer called Hogan… and were ‘pleading’ with him for assistance from his state and national forces.” He tried repeatedly to get the National Guard deployed to help, but to do this, they needed authorization from the Department of Defense, and he was “REPEATEDLY DENIED.” Trump inexplicably RESISTED sending the National Guard, despite watching the violence surge. Acting Secretary of Defense Christopher Miller said he spoke with Pence about sending in the Guard… Not mentioning Trump. Gov. Hogan said that he got a call about AN HOUR AND A HALF LATER asking for help, and he was like, “Yeah, we’ve been waiting. We’re ready.”

Governor Hogan — again, a republican — called for trump’s removal after the fiasco, and was quoted as saying, “I think there’s no question that America would be better off if the president would resign or be removed from office.”

So, to recap: He lied to a crowd. He incited them to violence, and directed them to the Capitol. He waited to tweet an attack against his Vice President until the terrorists were in the building he was in (where they chanted “Hang Mike Pence,” while having gallows set up outside). And then, when help was offered to quell the riot, he repeatedly resisted, forcing Congressional leadership to take other channels.

He needs to be removed, he needs to be convicted of his crimes. and he needs to go to prison. There has GOT to be a precedent set so that people know that this sort of thing has SEVERE consequences. We can NOT gloss over this in the name of “coming together” or any such nonsense. Do you want to know why? This is why:

If you appreciate this blog and the stuff I write, you can show that appreciation by helping support it. A really cool way to do that is to BECOME A PATRON. Or, if that’s not your thing, you can LEAVE A TIP ON PAYPAL, or Venmo a tip to “chris-boeskool”. Either way, please follow along for more fun ON FACEBOOK and also ON TWITTER. Thank you so much for reading.

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The NY Post Publicly Shamed A Paramedic For Her Sex Work. Here’s How You Can Help Her…

It looks like I’m at the stage of my messed up pandemic sleep schedule where I wake up every day at 4am, WIDE AWAKE, with no hope of ever sleeping again. And like I do when I’m wide awake in the middle of the night, I opened Twitter to see what is happening in the world. Today, I took a deep dive into an article posted in the New York Post by Dean Balsamini and Susan B. Edelman (if you click on their names, it will bring you to their Twitter profiles so you can tell them how much you appreciate their lack of journalistic ethics) about a woman named Lauren Kwei who has been working as a paramedic, but who got the side gig of posting sexy pictures on a Fans Only site.

A couple years ago, Lauren started working as an EMT for a private senior care, and was making about $15 an hour. She took a break, paid for training as a paramedic to make more money, worked as a hostess in a restaurant… And then last year, to help pay the bills, she started a Fans Only site, where people could pay her $12 a month to see sexy pictures of her. And I guess there aren’t enough news stories right now, because the Post approached her about her and informed her they were doing an article on her.

This is Lauren… She is brave and intelligent and self-reliant. Leave her. The hell. Alone.

Afraid that she might lose her job, she pleaded with them to keep her identity secret. They refused. And they posted THIS ARTICLE (please only click on it if you absolutely have to, because it would be a shame to give them even more ad revenue), where they repeatedly shamed her for her decision to make extra money with her body. Twitter came to her defense… I became aware of the story when AOC posted this:

When AOC comes for you, you know you are screwed.

She doesn’t know yet whether she will lose her job as a paramedic. Lauren is taking care of her father, who is very sick. Ugh… This whole thing is just so gross. The New York Post is such utter trash. Imagine deciding to mess with a 23 year old woman who is taking care of her sick father while literally risking her life working as a paramedic during COVID, and posting an article shaming her for posting sexy pictures of herself… So that she doesn’t have to work overtime. I’m so disgusted. It makes me want to spit.

Just a few days ago, I was at work — thinking about how much my feet hurt, and day dreaming about putting some lotion on them when I got home — and I jokingly said to some coworkers, “I wonder if I could start a Fans Only site where I just rubbed lotion on my feet for like 10 minutes at a time… Nothing *SUPER* sexual. Just sexy enough, you know?” They said it probably depends on what my feet look like. I told them the story about letting a camper paint my toenails orange one summer when I was working at camp, and discovering that my feet were F*CKING GORGEOUS, and describing how my vanity — in Grinch-esque fashion — grew three sizes that day. We all laughed, but I thought to myself, I’d TOTALLY let a couple dozen creepy people watch me rub my sore feet for $12 a month. In a heartbeat. But I digress…

So — as is often the custom — someone has started a GoFundMe for her. It’s RIGHT HERE. Yesterday Lauren responded to the generous people who have contributed so far. Here is what she wrote:

“I want to start off by thanking you all so much for standing up for me and fighting. I have read all your comments and messages and I’m feeling very overwhelmed with love and gratitude. Let me also say that I truly believe I do not HAVE to explain myself, but I want to. I know in my heart that I did nothing wrong, but it really helps to be reminded that I do not deserve to be treated like this or spoken about this way. All my life, I have been sexualized and treated as a sex object, no matter what I do or say. I sold pictures of myself on the internet for extra money because it’s easy. I didn’t pick up extra shifts because I cannot work 40+ hour weeks and maintain my mental health. I did not ask my parents for help because I’m adult and wanted to make my own money. I never once spoke of my pictures at work or used my job as a paramedic to solicit subscribers. I know I did nothing wrong and I have nothing to be ashamed of. Most of the quotes in that article are me defending myself to this reporter. He did not include that I begged him to remain anonymous (which was never agreed to) and that I told him my safety and job were going to be at risk if he posted this article. He truly did not care. He went on to call my employer and my mother. As some of you may know, I’ve been home with my family in WV following my father going into cardiac arrest last week. I have not been able to speak with my employer because of this and I still do not know what they are going to do. As of right now, I do still have a job but I will probably find out tomorrow if I don’t.

I reached out to a Facebook group called First Responderinos (a sub group of fans of a podcast called My Favorite Murder) and I had SO many people asking if they could donate money. A very kind soul put together a GoFundMe for me and my family. Under normal circumstances, I would never accept money from strangers, however my dad is the sole supporter of my family and will be out of work for at least 2 months. Any money donated to this GFM will be used for me and my family. I don’t think I deserve all the kindness you all have shown to me, but I cannot thank you all enough.

I’m a strong woman because I have strong women all around me. I did nothing wrong and I will not take this lying down. I will continue to fight for my name and reputation. I will speak out against this and tell my story in time and when I am ready. Thank you all so much. I love love love you all. Please forgive me if I haven’t responded to your messages.”

Please consider this line: “All my life, I have been sexualized and treated as a sex object, no matter what I do or say.We relentlessly sexualize our young women, and then we shame them when they decide to use their overly sexualized bodies to earn a living. It really needs to stop.

Anyway, I don’t have a lot of money right now… But I do have a bunch (ish) of people who follow this blog, and I wanted to do something to help her. If you have some extra money right now, please consider sending some of it her way. Here is her GoFundMe again. And if you feel like helping support me & this blog, you can learn how to do that HERE. Love y’all… And let’s stop shaming sex workers.

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Anti-Maskers, and The Right To Poop In Other People’s Food

In solidarity with the “My body, my choice” anti-maskers & COVID-deniers, I have decided I’m going to get a job at Smoothie King, and I’m going to blend a dollop of my own poop into the smoothies I make.

It’s a bit nutty… But it is protein-rich, it is gluten free, and it is certified organic.

And I’m not the only one. There is a nationwide “movement,” if you will, of people committed to shitting in other people’s food. I know there are people ALL OVER AMERICA who are committed to defecating in the things that other people are going to put in their mouths. We are everywhere! From fast food to fancy restaurants. So get ready…

Listen: If you don’t want to get sick, just stay home. But me? I’m not going to “live in fear” anymore. I’m going to get out there and LIVE MY LIFE. Like Braveheart said, “Everyone dies… Not everyone truly lives in a way that enables morons to drastically increase the risk of other people dying from E.coli.”

According to the OAN and Fox”News” programming that I watch on a daily basis, a VERY low percentage of E. coli cases end up with people dying. Sure, a lot of people MIGHT get sick… But the risk of DEATH is low. 98% of people who eat other people’s crap don’t even die from it! Most will recover. A lot of people who eat my poo smoothies end up asymptomatic. Anyway, E. coli is basically like the flu.

I’m sick and tired of BIG GOVERNMENT trying to tell me what I “can” and “can’t” do with my own feces. BIG PHARMA is in cahoots with all those “scientists” and liberal elitists trying to say that there should be regulations restricting our right to get other people sick. It’s a giant conspiracy, funded by George Soros. And if you rearrange the letters of George Soros’ name, you get the words FECAL SLAVERY… Which is their ultimate goal. The only ones who don’t agree with that have been bought and paid for by BIG SPELLING and BIG RATIONAL THOUGHT.

2020 has broken my non-violence.

I, for one, have had enough of “The Swamp” telling me what to do with my own body and my own poop. I’ve seen enough YouTube videos to know that NOT eating other people’s poo can be just as dangerous as eating other people’s poo. Besides, what’s next?!? Are they going to make it illegal for people to poop in their own homes?? This is a slippery slope if I’ve ever seen one… A slippery slope of poop.

Sure, call me “selfish.” It’s not my fault that all you liberals get all “triggered.” I’m not doing this just to “Own the Libs.” I’m doing this because it’s my God-given right as an American. I believe in three things: My right to shoot & kill anyone who makes me feel threatened in any way, my right to drop a deuce in other people’s food, and my right to tell a woman what to do with her body if she gets pregnant.

There are worse things than eating other people’s poo… Like the TYRANNY of being told you can’t take a dump in other people’s food. All of these so-called “mandates” are examples of government overreach… THIS IS ABOUT LIBERTY, PEOPLE! “First they came for my right to poop in other people’s food, and I said nothing…” You know what I’m saying?

It’s my right as an American! Show me where, in the Constitution, it says that people can’t #2 in someone else’s food. You can’t, can you.? I’m going to put my stool in other people’s food, as the Founding Fathers envisioned. Shitting in other people’s food is as American as baseball or apple pie with a bit of my poop in it. Stay strong, Patriots!!

I realize that 2020 has nearly killed satire, butt this blog has been missing some bathroom humor for a while. If you value this blog and you want to help support it, you can BECOME A PATRON (I initially wrote “become a Parton, which would also be rad). Leah did last week, and she requested a poem titled “Super Leah.” Here it is:

“Super Leah”

When she flies over Fort Wayne
Or Kim Jong Un, in North Korea, 
She drives the villains all insane,
Because you can’t kill an idea.
Her name’s a buzz. A hiss. A brain.
A splashy onomatopoeia…
Is it a bird? Is it a plane?
Holy shit, that’s Super Leah!

If becoming a patron is not for you, but you’d like to leave a tip (or contribute to the “Help pay for Chris’ kids’ Christmas present” fund), you can DO THAT ON PAYPAL or Venmo me at “chris-boeskool.” No matter what, you should be following me ON FACEBOOK and ON TWITTER. Stay safe. Look for places to laugh, and reasons to smile. Take care of each other.

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COVID-19, and Why We’re Totally Screwed

Here is a recap of a conversation I had tonight at the restaurant with a man who was wearing a camouflage American flag hat:

I was going to wear my camouflage American flag hat, but I couldn’t find it… #RimShot

Him: “How late are y’all open tonight?”
Me: “Eleven o’clock.”
Him: “What? I used to hang out here until 3am!”
Me: “Yeah… Because of the virus, restaurants in Nashville get in trouble if they have people here after 11pm.”
Him: “That is so dumb. In Williamson county — just one county over — they have like NO restrictions. I was just there the other day… The restaurant was PACKED.”
Me: “Oh yeah? Stuff like that might be why the U.S. had 183k new cases just yesterday.”
Him: “That’s only because we’re testing so much.”
Me: “We had more new cases yesterday alone than most countries in the world have had TOTAL cases since the pandemic started… You think that’s just due to testing?”
Him: “Anyway, it’s not the CASES that count. It’s how many people die.”
Me: “Unfortunately, we lead the world in that category as well. We have 4% of the world’s population, and 20% of the world’s COVID deaths.”
Him: “That’s only because hospitals are calling things COVID that aren’t COVID to get more money. They get like $10,000 extra to treat COVID cases.”
Me: “So you think doctors are all lying about it to get extra money? I have friends who are doctors and nurses, and I’ve talked to them about it… They are not lying.”
Him: “You think if you ask people if they are embezzling money, they’re just going to say Yes?”
Me: “So ALL of them are just lying for extra money?”
Him: “It’s mostly the hospital administrators. THEY’RE the ones pressuring people to say everything is COVID.”
Me: “And you don’t think — if the doctors & nurses were being pressured to LIE about COVID diagnoses — that anyone would come forward and tell about it? That’s a pretty big conspiracy theory, right there…”
Him: “I have a buddy from the military… Committed suicide. Put a shotgun in his mouth, and killed himself. They marked down his death as being due to COVID-19.”
Me [thinks to myself: “That didn’t happen.”]: “Hmmm. Yeah, well… I have a feeling we’re going to have to shut down again soon…. We missed our chance to take this seriously when we shut everything down in March through May.”
Him: “Europe took it seriously, and now their cases are spiking again just like ours.”
Me: “They’re cases are spiking again in some places where they stopped taking it seriously. Germany has 80 million people, but they only have like 15,000 deaths (the actual number is 12,619 deaths).”
Him: “The only reason the European Union is doing better than us is because they’ve got less people than us.”
Me [considers saying “Fewer,” but decides to say]: “Dude, the E.U. has about 120 million more people than we do.”
Him: “Nope. I just looked it up the other day. We’ve got way more people.”
Me [pulls phone out]: “Hey Siri, how many people are there in the European Union?”

I show him the screen that says “447.7 million,” he says, “I don’t think that’s right,” and I kiss my tip goodbye.

And, scene…

___________________________________________________________________________________________

In the middle of March, I was furloughed from my job working as a server. I know a lot of people look down at that job, but I don’t mind that much. I’m very good at it, and it has provided for my family for a long time. Like many other people, not having an income was a scary time for me. During the time I was out of work, I couldn’t have survived financially without the extra money the CARES Act added to unemployment benefits. I mostly stayed home. Going to the store to buy necessities felt like a panic attack… But at least I could afford to pay my bills and buy food for my family. But for people who lost their jobs in March & April, unemployment benefits have run out….

This past week, as the restaurant was doing enough business to bring me back on, I started back at work. It has felt really good to work hard and be able to earn money again. We are doing everything we can to keep people safe, but the numbers don’t lie. Unfortunately, while our nation has tried to weather this pandemic, we have been under the leadership of an incompetent narcissist, and now we are heading towards another shut down. We have 70 million people in this country who think that doctors & scientists are lying to us, but they believe the word of an ex reality show host & failed steak salesman… The sort of people who see a computer tell you how many people live in the European Union, and when they see the answer, they say, “I don’t think that’s right.”

In late March, when most states issued stay-at-home orders, there were about 26,000 TOTAL cases in the entire country, and around 1,000 total deaths. That was enough for the majority of the states in the country to issue stay-at-home orders. Then, before the election, as 1000 people a day were dying from this virus, a fragile, broken man was holding multiple super spreader event rallies every day, leaving his followers stranded in the cold (because he doesn’t pay his bills), and was jealous of the media coverage the virus was getting… Saying, “It’s covid, covid, covid. You can’t watch anything else.” Now, so far this WEEK, there have been just shy of 925,000 new cases of coronavirus in this country. Over the same six day period in the United States, 6,734 people have taken their last labored breath because of COVID-19… And for another 66 days, we are stuck with a monster who doesn’t care one bit. Trump & the republican party has completely surrendered to this virus.

The plan for how to deal with a pandemic is fairly straightforward. You listen to the experts, and you take their advice. Leadership provides clear messaging. Stay at home unless it’s absolutely necessary. Wear a mask. Social distance. Enforce mandates. Quarantine the sick. Access to testing. Provide detailed contact tracing.

Instead, what we got was a liar who didn’t want to spook the markets. We got a conman who pushed the debunked miracle cure hydroxycloroquine. We got a moronic child, who would rather file lawsuits about an election he lost than do ANYTHING to help people who are hurting. And we got a charlatan, who caters to the fear and bigotry of masses of people like my camouflage hat-wearing friend… Relentlessly deceiving them until they don’t have a clue what the truth is anymore. And when we finally have competent, compassionate, honest leadership for this nation, they will try to blame to pain of the new shutdown on the new administration. But make no mistake: The reason we will have to do it again is because we lacked the leadership to do it right the first time.

Thanks for reading. I love you all so much. Thank you for all the kind words of love and encouragement I received after the previous post. Honestly, from the bottom of my heart: Thank you. If you’d like to become a Patron and help support this blog, you can DO THAT HERE. If you’d like to leave a tip, you can DO THAT ON PAYPAL or Venmo me at “chris-boeskool.” There’s also a lot of fun happening on my FACEBOOK PAGE and also ON TWITTER.

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My Divorce.

I’m completely terrified right now. I told myself that the next blog that I was going to write I was going to be titled “My Divorce.” And so I’ve been putting it off… And putting it off. And something about writing it down — here especially — makes it feel really real. Like it’s actually happening. I’m such an unreasonably hopeful person. I still don’t want to believe that it’s happening. But it IS happening. It’s time for me to be honest… Not just with you, but with myself.

A little over a year ago, my wife told me she didn’t want to be married to me anymore. She said that she’s 100% sure, and that she wasn’t interested in any sort of marital counseling. There is nothing — literally nothing — which could have come as more of a shock to me than hearing this from her. If you had pulled a live alligator out any orifice of my body, I wouldn’t have been as surprised. Weeks earlier, I was bragging to strangers about how this time of married life was so sweet. We had our stresses and our struggles like any other couple… Mostly about finances. But I had put fear of her leaving me away a long time ago.

Saying “I do” was probably the scariest thing I had ever done. My parents got divorced when I was a kid, and I grew up looking at divorce as one of the great failures in a person’s life. I have always found it easy to love deeply, but with that love came an almost equally deep fear… Fear that she would leave. I carried that fear into the first 12 or so years of our marriage. Initially it came out in insecurity and jealously. It came out in being afraid to say no when she wanted to do something that sounded exhausting. It came out in trying to do ALL the things. My dad was the furthest thing from a good husband and father, and I was terrified of being like him… Of being unloving… Of being a failure at being a good husband and father. But people have different definitions of what that means. I had this idea that being a “good husband” meant I had to be all things for her. And I think if she found life outside of me, it made me afraid that I wasn’t doing a good job of supplying all her needs.

Then, about five or six years ago, I released that fear. I let go of the built up fear from the places where my heart had been broken before. I realized that I could NEVER be everything she needed, and whatever brought her Life, I was all for it. I trusted her completely. Or, as close to completely as my consciousness allowed. Which made this announcement… Shattering.

This is my wedding ring. I didn’t used to wear it all the time, because I had a bump on my knuckle, and it was too tight. I got it resized after she left… If that gives you any insight into my headspace.

I had about a three day panic attack, where I couldn’t eat or sleep. I thought I was having a heart attack. And if I’m being honest, that ache in my chest has never really gone away… It’s here right now. I learned about something called “anxiety.” I started seeing a counselor. I slept on the couch. When she was there, we passed each other in the hallway like strangers. About six months later, she moved out. Our three kids spend half their time with her, and half their time with me. They are resilient and funny and frustrating and lovely and difficult and wildly intelligent. They are kind and lazy and mean and creative and hungry… And they don’t make fun of me when they find me crying for no reason.

I’ve made MANY mistakes. There are many things I did and didn’t do which certainly led to the growing resentment that broke my heart, devastated my life, and shattered my family. I never even considered they could be at a level that would wind up with me living with the new, sour flavor in my mouth of phrases like “your mom’s house.” I think one of the hardest things is losing a family. For close to half my life, I thought of her family as MY family. I genuinely love those people. Now these people who I thought accepted me and loved me are now just… Gone. Sometimes in life, people just decide that they are done. And sometimes in life, you are forced to learn that there are many things you can’t control.

I wish I was strong enough to fight for her. I think I’m too heartbroken to do anything. Anyway, I don’t even know what that would look like. She knows me. She knows me better than anyone… And she doesn’t want to be with me. It’s much easier being rejected by people who DON’T know your heart. Still, I’m stupid with hope. I’ve talked to people who have been divorced for years, and they still hope for a reconciliation. But I’ve been talking about believing women… I have to believe her when she says that there is no chance to fix this. I have no interest in starting over. I still don’t understand how the legality of divorce works. It’s not final yet. I hate it… Having this person who I have always been for, and now being forced into a situation where I feel like that isn’t be the case… I don’t know how to be anything but for her. To an unhealthy degree, actually. I’m not sure how to make decisions with myself in mind (I’m also learning about something called “codependence”).

So I’m definitely depressed. And that’s really something I am unfamiliar with. Sometimes I sleep for about 11-12 hours… Other times I lie in bed until the sun starts coming in the windows, followed by three or four small naps. And I’m really SO sorry for neglecting my writing here more than usual (for those of you who look forward to this). All this shit happened in conjunction with COVID, and me being furloughed from my job because of the virus, and the stupid, lonely isolation of quarantine. Combine those things with seasonal depression and the uneasy despair over this coming election, and it’s made for some very dark days. I think I feel ashamed. But the reason has nothing to do with any Christian expectation or the “sinfulness” of divorce, and everything to do with feeling rejected by my best friend. There are people who looked up to us — and to our marriage — and I feel like I’m letting those people down, so it’s not something I’ve been talking about with too many people. I love her… And I can’t stand to see her… And I don’t know what to do next. I’ve been dreading writing this, and so I’ve been putting it off for months. And that’s made me feel like a coward. But maybe writing this post will be the mucus plug that signals the coming birth of a new, less sad time.

Or maybe not. I still feel destroyed. Either way, I thought you should know….

Thank you for reading my mucus plug. Thank you SO much to my Patrons, whose support has helped keep my afloat. If you feel like supporting this blog and my writing, you can BECOME A PATRON. If you’d like to leave a tip, you can DO THAT ON PAYPAL, or you can Venmo your generosity to “chris-boeskool”. Otherwise, I’d love if you’d join me on FACEBOOK or on TWITTER.

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If You Vote For This Monster, You Don’t Ever Get To Call Yourself “Pro Life” Again

All over the world, countries with competent, moral leadership have done the difficult things it took to mitigate the spread of this deadly virus. The United States has failed miserably. While we are having 800, 1000, 1200 people dying in a DAY, countries like Canada & Germany & even Italy haven’t seen that many deaths if you total their death toll OVER THE LAST FOUR MONTHS. The fragile, weak-minded man in the White House lied & bragged about the administration’s non-existent response to the coronavirus, and within months of this virus’ appearance, the U.S. became the world’s epicenter for both cases and deaths.

Every question, from every journalist, at every press briefing from now until November should be “Why did you lie to the country & act like this virus wasn’t a very big deal, causing the deaths of more than 200k American people?”

IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY. As much as this republican administration likes to act like this was some sort of inevitability, it wasn’t. We have a president who — when asked about our nation’s dismal response to COVID19 — lies about our response… He brags about what a good job we are doing… And when pressed with actual statistics, he says, “It is what it is.” He is even on tape talking about how he “likes to downplay” the seriousness of the coronavirus, even though he was briefed and informed in January and February about how deadly and easily transmissible coronavirus was. Imagine if a governor was given information that a dam was failing… And instead of warning the town below the failing dam, he acted like it was not a very big deal. And THEN, when he is asked about how his dishonesty caused the needless deaths of thousands, he says he “didn’t want to cause a panic” and says, “It is what it is.”

Who in their right mind would vote to reelect such a person? And how could they ever be described as “pro-life”???

Even now, as science is CLEAR about the life-saving benefits of wearing a mask, he continues to downplay the seriousness of the situation we are in. He does this, all while insisting that EVERY PERSON who gets anywhere near him is tested on a daily basis. And then the masses of ignorant followers see him — without a mask — and think, “I don’t have to wear a mask either… I’m not going to LIVE IN FEAR.” He attempts to shame journalists who wear masks, and he rolls his eyes at people, not living in his same protective bubble, who choose to act responsibly & compassionately by doing something so simple to help mitigate the spread of a virus that has already killed over 200,000 Americans. It’s honestly difficult for me to listen to this raging narcissist speak for a 23 second clip, but try to stomach it…

He starts to say, “You’re healthy…” knowing full well that this virus has killed hundreds of thousands of otherwise healthy people… Knowing full well that people who are not showing any symptoms can still spread this disease… Knowing full well that the mask Jeff Mason wears does not protect HIM, nearly as much as it protects others. And the grossest, most cowardly thing of all: He does this from a very safe distance, with every person who comes into contact with him being tested daily. And do you know WHY he has every person tested? Because he KNOWS this is deadly.

Oh my God, 200,000 people… That’s like SIXTY-SEVEN September 11th attacks. That is HALF the number of the American soldiers who died in World War II — A war that took about six years… We’ve had this many Americans die in six MONTHS. These are more than numbers. They are PEOPLE. They are smiles with lives and dreams and talents and families. And they’re not just old people on death’s door.

And still, he actively works to downplay the seriousness of this virus. In early April, the United States Post Office had a plan to mail 5 reusable masks to every household in the nation. The White House killed their plan, because they wanted to project strength and control… And because it was an election year. Below is their press release..

And it’s not like we’ve “gotten past the worst of it.” Experts predict that the United States death toll could be over 400,000 by year’s end. And no one even knows how the flu season will affect the way this virus acts… But one thing is for sure: Get used to the term “Co-infection.” As outbreaks continue, schools will continue to close… Businesses will continue to close… The economy will continue to be disrupted… People won’t be able to pay their bills… And everything will continue to suck. After six months, you don’t get paid unemployment anymore (ask me how I know this)… This is going to have a big effect on foreclosures, which — as we learned 12 years ago — can spiral into a giant recession or another depression. But all that is just the economic effects. Last week Canada had 40 total COVID19 deaths. Over the same week, the U.S. had 5,967 people die as a result of this disease.

Long story short, donald trump is a horribly broken human being, and an even worse leader. We have more COVID19 deaths in one day than countries with competent, moral leadership have had over the course of FOUR MONTHS. And STILL he insists on holding indoor rallies, with no mask mandates… All while keeping people a VERY safe distance from him, and ensuring that anyone who comes anywhere near him is tested daily. He is a monster, and if you vote for him, you are too. This is not a matter of a “difference of opinion.” It’s a difference of MORALITY.

After Ruth Bader Ginsburg died, tens of millions of dollars was donated to democratic candidates and groups. After her death, Georgia’s Doug Collins despicably linked her life of service to the number of abortions and said “RIP to the… unborn babies” (even though SIX of the seven SCOTUS majority justices who voted on Roe v. Wade were appointed by republicans). Republican senators who withheld Merrick Garland’s SCOTUS appointment (because they wanted to let the voters decide) are hypocritically changing their tunes. Everything is awful and stupid and I’m sad all the time…

But listen: We are not going to be able to use the hypocrisy of the GOP to “shame” them into doing the right thing. They don’t care. The ONLY thing we can do is vote them out. Trump is a cancer on this country, and we must ALL do everything we can to remove him from power… And what that looks like right now is obviously voting for Joe Biden. But it’s also supporting & becoming knowledgable about candidates in down ballot elections. It is everyone’s responsibility to vote. The goal of authoritarians is to wear us down with so much awfulness that we stop caring enough to fight back. That is NOT an option right now. I’ll leave you with the words of another woman who — like RBG — will be remembered as an American hero… Not just “a hero for women,” but a hero for all Americans.

Please, PLEASE vote.

Thanks so much for reading. This started as a Facebook post, and then I just kept on writing… This week feels like the cherry on top of the poop sundae that has been 2020. But we must not lose heart. We are strong. Love is stronger than fear. Truth is stronger than lies.

Thank you so much to Kathryn, the one new Patron who signed up to support me on Patreon. This week was hard, and I can’t tell you how much your support means to me. As promised, here is a poem for you…

Kathryn, pure & wild
Tuscan kissed and generous
Breath of hopeful air

If you value this blog, and you’d like to support my writing, you can also BECOME A PATRON. Or you can LEAVE A TIP ON PAYPAL or Venmo me at “chris-boeskool”. Or you can find a down ballot race, and give them some money. Either way, thank you for reading, and check me out on Facebook and on Twitter for more fun. And vote like your lives depend on it. They do.

Chris

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This Flag Is a Symbol of Racism.

Yesterday I made the mistake of commenting on a “Back The Blue” social media post (one that was put up on a Facebook community page, of all places… Not particularly known for being forums of rational thought & conversation). The post was in response to the two L.A. police officers who were shot the other day. It basically said, “Hey police officers: We want you to know we’ve got your six” (which, if you don’t know, is military speak for “watching someone’s back”). The military reference seemed very intentional, as the poster was letting law enforcement know that the community is watching out for people who might be trying to ambush them while they’re pumping gas, eating at a restaurant, etc… and ready to jump into the fight, presumably pulling out pistols and pumping people full of bullets. Hundreds of people liked the status.

So I made a comment reminding People Of Color that I had THEIR backs… That I would film interactions between police and the Black people I saw… That — when two officers put a Black man in a choke hold and beat him unconscious for not having his I.D. while being a passenger in an Uber (as happened a few days ago) — I would work to see the officers fired and charged for their crimes… That — when a handcuffed man is slowly murdered by a cop who kneeled on his neck for nearly NINE MINUTES while he called out for his dead mother, or a women is killed in her own home for doing absolutely nothing — I would work to dismantle the systemic racism within policing which makes Black folks nearly THREE TIMES MORE LIKELY to be killed by an officer of the law…

You’d have thought I pissed on the 9/11 memorial. People were… NOT pleased. They insisted that I was one who was racist, for bringing up race. QAnon cultists showed up, demanding that “pedophilia” was the REAL problem in this country, and insisting that “800,000 kids every year” are abducted and sold into sex slavery, or some BS (when really, the number is closer to 115 kids per year). I was told that I should be ashamed of myself. I was told that it’s a Christian’s responsibility to support the police. They even tagged a Black conservative (who is into QAnon & doesn’t believe that systemic racism exists) to argue with me. All in all, I wasted about two hours of my life.

You know what? I don’t know about that… Maybe it wasn’t a waste? It was definitely a waste if you judge wasted time by the number of QAnon cultists’ minds you’ve changed. But maybe there were some people reading along at home who read something that made sense. Maybe a Black person living in a conservative southern town felt seen or supported in some way. And maybe I worked out some stuff in my own mind too… One of those things I have worked out is that the whole “Back The Blue” and “Thin Blue Line” and “Blue Lives Matter” movement is INSEPARABLE from the racism behind it. And that includes this racist garbage right here:

I once got suspended from Facebook for a week for posting a picture of the blue line flag being peeled back to reveal a nazi swastika underneath. I have a tattoo of Zuck to commemorate the hard time I did…

Now, many of you are probably thinking, “I don’t know that we should call that ‘racist.’ That’s just people showing their support for the police.” Well, let me explain it to you…

The creation of this flag came about as part of a “Blue Lives Matter” reaction to the Black Lives Matter movement. Think about that for a moment: Blue Lives Matter is a COUNTER-movement to complaints about human rights abuses. When people were angry about continued police killings of black people, the phrase “Black Lives Matter” was one they could rally around. And “Blue Lives Matter” was a response to & dismissal of that rallying call. It does this in the same way that “White Lives Matter” dismisses the inherent value of Black lives.

For those who don’t remember, “Blue Lives Matter” started after the killing of two New York police officers shortly after a grand jury decided not to indict NYPD officer Daniel Pantaleo, who killed Eric Garner with a choke hold after he was accused of selling loose cigarettes. His dying words, “I can’t breathe” became another rallying cry against police violence and systemic racism. Protests were taking place after Garner’s murder, as well as the recent police killing of Michael Brown. The man who murdered the officers was Black, and he ended up committing suicide afterward. Since the killings came a couple weeks after the decision to not charge Daniel Pantaleo (much like the shootings of the L.A. officers came after a week of unrest after the police killing of Dijon Kizzee, a black man who was stopped while riding his bike), many people assumed they were revenge killings against the police… But there is no proof of that. Anyway, that’s where the “Blue Lives Matter” human rights countermovement originated.

You can find the blue line flag at just about any place where a Black Lives Matter counter-protest is happening… And if you see it, you’re likely to see some confederate flags as well. The same sorts of people fly these two flags. We see this many places, but one which stood out was at the “Unite The Right” rally in Charlottesville, where white supremacists and neo-nazi demonstrators carried tiki torches and yelled “Jews will not replace us.” It has become a favorite symbol of law enforcement officers and angry white people alike. Here is what recently happened when a Pittsburg officer was told that his blue line flag mace mask was disrespectful to the U.S. flag…

The blue line flag has become a symbol of perceived persecution against police. They’re feeling “not supported.” Which — I’m sorry, but… NOT SUPPORTED?!? Police officers have got to be the most supported group in the country. They eat for free or at least for half price just about everywhere. They have qualified immunity. Their words & testimony weigh more in court. If they bust into the wrong house and kill an innocent woman, the COMMUNITY pays their $12 million civil suit settlement. How much more support do they want? I mean, good grief — When the two officers were shot in L.A., the president of the United States called for the death penalty for the Black man who shot them, and then — even though the shooter was by himself — he posted the video of the shooting and connected him to “Animals that need to be hit hard” (Which begs the question: To which “animals” is he referring here?). This interpretation of calls for increased accountability for police officers as “persecution” reminds me of how, when people are accustomed to privilege, they interpret those movements toward equality as “oppression.”

The rate of police officers killed while on duty is near historic lows. I have seen the video of the shooting, and it is scary & horrific. I understand seeing something like that and feeling scared & angry & under siege. But when — after a random criminal commits an act of violence against a member of a police force — people try to make police out to be an oppressed group, it is a lot like when the 5 year old boy (who was white) was shot and killed by a Black man, and white people everywhere threw their hands ups and screamed, “WHERE IS THE OUTRAGE OVER THIS?!?” Well, number one, it’s everywhere. Including your post about it. Number two, one is a random act of senseless violence committed by a criminal, and the other is part of a PATTERN OF BEHAVIOR, committed & condoned by systemic forces who are supposed to protecting citizens & upholding the law.

We live in a country with 4.25% of the world’s population, but 22% of the world’s prisoners. One out of every 100 Americans is in prison or in jail, and 33% of those prisoners are Black… even though only 12% of the U.S. population is Black. Black Americans are incarcerated at more than five times the rate of whites. THESE THINGS ARE SYSTEMIC.

When explaining why “All Lives Matter” is harmful garbage, it’s often explained that there is an understood “Too” at the end of Black Lives Matter. In a similar way — as a counter-reaction to BLM — “All Lives Matter,” “Blue Lives Matter,” and “White Lives Matter” all have an understood “No,” in front of those phrases. If you’re wondering how the blue line flag is inseparable from the racism behind it, ask yourself this question: How would the people who fly this flag (or buy the Blue Line T-shirts and other merch) react if Black civil rights groups took a U.S. flag and changed all the colors around to make it about THEM, instead of ALL Americans? Or, if that doesn’t do it for you, go to any Blue Lives Matter/Thin Blue Line Facebook group, and read the comments & wade through the overt racism of the people who hang out there…

There is one more reason my time spent mired in madness on that Facebook page wasn’t a complete waste… There was this lovely, kind woman who reminded me that so many people are are scared & hurting right now, and that she felt it was her responsibility “to model and express empathy, understanding and most of all, support,” in the hopes that people might learn from her example and show the same level of support, advocacy, & understanding for People of color. Which is so true & beautiful. At the same time, if a group of people is experiencing harassment, brutality, & oppression from a group in a position of power, and — when they cry out that their lives MATTER — you respond with “Nah… The powerful people’s lives matter,” you’ll have to forgive me if I see it as less of a statement of support for the powerful group, and more of a statement of opposition to the value of the lives of the ones being oppressed. Instead of police feeling like equal members of our community, having a different flag encourages an “Us vs. Them” mentality… And the “Them” has historically been folks who are black and brown. When I see someone flying that blue line flag, I don’t see “support for police officers.” I see support for systemic racism.

Thanks for reading. You can support my writing and this blog by BECOMING A PATRON. No one took me up on the “Poem for new Patrons” offer after the last post, so I’ll keep it going… Yours for becoming a $2/month Patron. If you’d like to leave a tip, you can DO THAT ON PAYPAL, or you can Venmo a tip to “chris-boeskool.” You are also invited to follow along on Facebook and on Twitter.

Thanks again,

Chris

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Trump Thinks Anti-Racism Trainings are “Anti-American.” What Does That Say About How He Views America?

This republican administration has a new enemy: Diversity Training. It turns out that trump has directed the Office of Budget & Management to crack down on anti-racism trainings which take place within federal agencies. He called Diversity Trainings “divisive, anti-American propaganda,” and he called “Critical Race Theory” a “sickness that cannot be allowed to continue” and asked his followers to “report any sightings so we can quickly extinguish” while posting a Breitbart article (of course)…

A couple things about “Critical Race Theory”: First of all, I would bet everything of value I have in the world that donald j. trump couldn’t tell you what Critical Race Theory is… Even if you promised him that by doing it, he’d make Putin SUPER proud. This is one of those things that Stephen Miller ran across in a white supremacist chat room in some dark corner of the internet, he told donald that federal agencies were teaching employees that White Privilege is a real thing, and then, VOILÀ! You got yourself an executive order.

Critical Race Theory comes from a larger social philosophy called Critical Theory. In short, CT argues that the world’s social problems are more a result of societal structures than they are influenced by individual actions… And IDEOLOGY is the biggest barrier to human liberation. Critical Race Theory focuses on racial power structures, it values people’s stories & experiences, and it acknowledges the fact that white supremacy has been woven into the fabric of America since the very beginning. To many, this is understood to be self-evident. To some — particularly white people in positions of power — these ideas are seen as a threat.

They don’t want white people being taught that they benefit from racism, or that there are certain privileges that automatically come with being part of the dominant culture in a society. They want to FIGHT the idea that racism is systemic — that there don’t need to be individual racists for white supremacy to work its magic throughout the power structures of America. As Robin DiAngelo talks about in the video below, instead of racism being understood as systemic, white supremacy wants to reduce racism to 1) an INDIVIDUAL, 2) who CONSCIOUSLY does not like people based on race, and 3) who INTENTIONALLY seeks to be mean to them. Individual Conscious Intent. NEVER a system. Please watch this.

This same strategy is used when combatting criticism of the racism & brutality endemic to policing in the United States. If the problem is systemic, then the solution must one that addresses the SYSTEM. Systemic problems require systemic changes… And those sorts of changes are painful. But if you reduce the problem to “one bad apple,” THEN it’s easily handled. You just get rid of that “one bad apple” and your problem is solved. And when the same thing happens again, it’s just ANOTHER “bad apple.” But at some point, the appearance of “bad apples” becomes a pattern (not to mention that the rest of that “bad apple” idiom says “spoils the bunch”). And at that point, they have to start attacking the ones pointing out the patterns (journalism, science, academia, etc…). Which historically has led to the increased nationalism & growing fascism we have been witnessing in the United States.

Everything they don’t like becomes “anti-American.” The anti-racists are anti-American… The anti-fascists are anti-American… But what does that say about their idea of what “American” means when being anti-racist & anti-fascist is deemed “anti-American?” Please make no mistake: They attack Diversity Trainings because the foundation they are built on is that racism is both REAL and SYSTEMIC. They attack Critical Race Theory for the same reason they are pissed off about the 14th Amendment, the Voting Rights Act, and Brown vs. Board of Education. This republican administration (along with right wing media) would have you believe that any discussion of the realities of systemic oppression is “anti-American.” The GOP looks at CRT as a policy of grievance & envy & “victimhood.” Any pushback against the idea of American exceptionalism is “anti-American.” Any talk about how there are parts of the American system that need FIXING is “anti-American” (which, by the way, is hypocritical to the point of being hilarious… Seeings how they have now run TWO campaigns with the slogan “Make America Great Again,” which is based on the grievance that America ISN’T great, and needs to be made that way). Trump has cast himself as the “defender of white America.”

Republicans are so invested in attacking a social philosophy which acknowledges the reality of systemic and institutional racism, of white supremacy, of white privilege, of intersectionality, of microaggressions… Phrases which people on the right use as punch lines… But beyond that, please understand that these ideas are a THREAT. And they’re not just a threat to the pride that comes from the idea that white folks have “earned” everything they have (with hard work, respect, determination, and a good attitude). The REAL threat is to the foundational idea of their own SUPREMACY.

Follow me here: They want need to believe that America is a FAIR place where the most qualified person gets the job… Where all you need is hard work to succeed… Where the police won’t mess with you if you simply follow the law. They want need America to be “post-racial,” so that their white kid isn’t “oppressed” when college admissions take things into account other than just test results (that are connected to a school with more resources, which is connected to a neighborhood with higher home prices and tax dollars that go to their school systems, which is connected to racist housing policies and redlining which prevented a black kid’s ancestors form building wealth, which is connected to Jim Crow, and slavery, and on and on). They want need an America where the playing field is level, because when the playing field is level, then they can attribute their own success to being BETTER. Also known and “supremacy.”

This is also why so many racist people are also misogynists — Because the idea of the imaginary level playing field nicely explains their position of privilege. They’re just better. If women with MBAs only make 74 cents for every dollar that their male counterparts make, it’s not because of any kind of oppression or anything “systemic.” It’s because men are just better at business. And if whites own 90% of the wealth and Blacks only own 2.6% of the wealth, it’s because whites “work harder.” If Blacks only make up 13% of the general population, but 40% of the prison population, it’s because they are more “prone to crime.” Maybe that’s also why even though Black children make up 18% of the preschool population, they account for 50% of the preschool suspensions.

He knows he can’t alienate his base…

The U.S. is so racist that when folks protest racism, people think they’re protesting America. We know systemic racism is real (HERE is some really good proof). Racial discrepancies exist… And in America, almost every social & economic difference between racial demographics favors white people. Either this is due to the existence of systems of oppression (Critical Race Theory), or this is due to one group just being “better” (White Supremacy). And THAT is why this racist administration is attacking Diversity Training. THAT is why republicans view Critical Race Theory as “anti-American propaganda.” They’re afraid if we acknowledge that systemic racism is real, it will take away the intellectual case for embracing white supremacy. That system has worked very well to benefit the people who have all the power & wealth… And they are not interested in changing it.

And this is not to say that a vote for Joe Bide will change this system. It won’t. But a vote for Joe Biden will move us CLOSER to that goal. The goal of Equality. And Justice. And a More Perfect Union. If trump’s supporters haven’t abandoned him by now, they never will. The way in not to try to change their minds… The only way is to out-vote them. We must ALL vote.

THANK YOU! You reading this means a lot to me. Here’s a deal: If you BECOME A PATRON for $2/month or more, I will write to a kick ass Haiku that will go along with my next post. It really helps. Or, if you want to leave a tip (like Dale, Carol, & Amanda — All of whom are completely kick ass), you can do that ON PAYPAL or by Venmo-ing me at “chris-boeskool.” You can also follow along on TWITTER and on FACEBOOK.

Thanks again,

Chris

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The Ten Types of Trump Supporters

Do you ever look at the relentless stream of horribleness coming from the mind & mouth & cell phone of the person occupying the Oval Office and think to yourself, “What kind of person would support this monster?” I do. It’s stunning. I am bewildered & disheartened on a daily basis as seemingly intelligent & relatively moral people throw their support behind a truly despicable demagogue. And like so many others, that’s the thing that leaves me feeling the most hopeless: Not that someone as broken as trump exists… Not even that someone like him could rise to power… But that — even after the despicable display of dishonesty & depravity, incompetence & bigotry we have seen over the past three and a half years — there are still a sizable group of people out there who are excited having him lead our nation.

I remember reading an article a few years ago that tried to quantify what sorts of people were voting for a person like trump. They analysis found FIVE UNIQUE CLUSTERS OF TRUMP SUPPORTERS: “American Preservationists (20%), Staunch Conservatives (31%), Anti-Elites (19%), Free Marketeers (25%), and the Disengaged (5%).” And as good of a job as that did of summing up his support after the 2016 election, I believe that — over the shit show we have witnessed over this presidency — some other important groups have formed. Here are ten that I have come up with:

DISCLAIMER: My analysis is not based on surveys or science… It is based both on what I have witnessed with the people around me (in real life, and on social media), and on what I thought would be somewhat funny and fun to read. Also, it should be pointed out that people can DEFINITELY fit into more than one category… So the percentages are an estimation, and do not add up to 100%.

1. ONE ISSUE VOTERS (31%). These are mostly “christian” folks to whom you can show an endless amount of evidence that trump is morally bankrupt & evil, and they will end up talking about abortion every single time. Despite the fact that if you want fewer abortions, you should be voting for democrats… Despite the fact that God prescribes abortions in the Bible & seems to be pro-abortion… Despite the logical inconsistencies of anti-abortion folks who believe that “saving souls” is what it’s all about… There are always going to be those who would happily vote for the love child of Lucifer & Jeffrey Dahmer if he slapped a “Pro-Life” sticker on his lapel.

2. BILLIONAIRES (< 1%). It’s a good time to be rich. If you are a person whose wealth is tied to the markets, the last 12 years or so have been good to you. Over the course of the pandemic, billionaires have gotten $637 BILLION richer (though that info was from August 3, so it’s more than that by now). But as this meme shows, that’s not you or me:

What’s this “Bank Account” thing I keep hearing about?

Which leads me to the third group…

3. IDIOTS (12% – 79%). Some folks are just dumb. God bless ’em… Either our educational system has failed them, or they were homeschooled by parents who were homeschooled, or they were taught at some defunct Bible College that science is the devil… I don’t know. They can’t figure out that they are voting against their own interests, they don’t know when they’re being lied to, they can’t recognize a reputable source. There are a lot of trump supporters out there who make the movie “Idiocracy” look eerily prophetic. His biggest demographic is non-college-educated white men. But like their hero said, “I love the poorly educated.”

When you think this guy is intelligent, you aren’t.

4. DICTATORS (< 1%). Enemies of America LOVE this president… Partially because they love seeing America slip from a place of international power & respect, partially because they enjoy watching us tear each other apart while the moron in the White House enflames racial division, but ALSO because trump LOVES himself some dictators. He regularly criticizes leaders of democratic countries while repeatedly praising authoritarian strongmen. Luckily, they can’t vote. Unfortunately, they CAN spend vast sums of money to influence the election in trump’s favor — Usually taking advantage of members of group number 3…

5. KARENS (6%). If you are an insufferable, middle-aged white woman with short, frosted hair, who calls the police when Black folks don’t give you the respect you think you are entitled to, who will threaten to sue someone who flips you off as you speed by them in your giant SUV, who would like to speak to the manager RIGHT NOW, and who is prone to selling essential oils while sharing dubious anti-vaccination articles, there is a pretty good chance you’re voting for trump.

6. PEOPLE WHO WANT TO BURN IT ALL DOWN (9%). These can be Bernie Bros… They can be charismatic christians who believe that they are somehow ushering in the apocalypse & the return of Jesus… They can be ultra-right libertarians & anti-government types who squeal with delight as trump fills cabinet positions with people who have spent their lives hating and trying to destroy the agencies they oversee. If you think government is not the answer, you LOVE seeing people who celebrate & flaunt their incompetence in positions of power.

Brilliance from Bill Bramhall.

7. TROLLS (4%). If you are a coward who gets some sort of gratification from going online and anonymously trying to make people angry and ruin people’s days, you are almost certainly voting for trump. You’re afraid to use your real names when you spread your hatred… But you love him, because you love that he has figured out how to spread his hated without losing his job.

8. GUN NUTS (8%). I’m not talking about people who own guns and appreciate the 2nd Amendment… I’m talking about the folks who are amassing an arsenal in their bunkers/basements (next to their nonperishable foods and WWII nazi memorabilia), and who send their kids to apocalypse survivalist camps where they teach teens how to read a Bible and fire a gun. If you fantasize about militias & second civil wars, you are voting for the candidate who is willing to fan the flames of division if he thinks it will help him stay in power.

Perfection from Signe Wilkinson… I’m voting for the one trying to put OUT the fire.

9. PEOPLE WHO ARE MAD ABOUT NOT BEING FUNNY (30%). Conservatives aren’t funny. There is something in the ability to discern humor that must be connected to the ability to smell bullshit. A lot of people who have spent their whole lives unable to make people laugh are now angry about it. They feel like 2nd class citizens, and they feel a sense of camaraderie within the MAGA crowd. It’s a fraternity of the unfunny. And they are unaware of how hilarious that is…

10. THE LITERAL WORST PEOPLE IN THE WORLD (25%). Admittedly, this one is kind of a catch-all. It includes White Supremacists & Literal Nazis, Conspiracy Theorists & Anti-Maskers, Misogynists & Sexists, QAnon Cultists & White People Who Have Confused Christianity With Nationalism… Basically, if you see someone somehow take pride in saying something so repugnant that it makes your skin crawl, 99% of these people are planning on voting for trump. People who watch Tucker Carlson. People who share memes celebrating 17 year old kids murdering protesters. People like failed QAnon congressional candidate, trump supporter (whom he retweeted when she posted #FireFauci), & all-around pile of awfulness, DeAnna Lorraine, who posted this gem (before it got removed for violating Twitter’s terms of service):

You might remember her from the now deleted tweet where asked if George Floyd’s family was lured to the Democratic convention with “free meth.” When Hillary talked about the “basket of deplorables,” she aimed way too small with her choice of a “basket.” It’s a giant sewage tank. They’re the sort of folks who take pride in being deplorable, and they’re his base. And whether trump wins or loses, we are going to be dealing with the ramifications of having so many of these sorts of people in our country for MANY years (It should be noted that this does not mean that 25% of the Literal Worst People in the World are trump supporters… It means that 25% of his support comes from the Literal Worst People in the World. Upwards of 99% of the Literal Worst People in the World are trump supporters).

So there you have it. This’s what we are up against. This is why we ALL have to vote. If you possess the capability to understand that trump is the worst of us, then you have a responsibility to vote to remove him from a position where he can do as much damage as he has done to this country. There is only one person who can do that, and his name is Joe Biden. I don’t care if he’s not your favorite, and I don’t care if he wasn’t your first choice (he wasn’t mine either). He’s our only chance. VOTE!

Thank you once again for reading. Thank you SO MUCH to Steve, Kristine, Debora, Carol & Rosemarie for leaving a tip on my PREVIOUS POST. If you are feeling generous and would like to leave a tip, you can do that ON PAYPAL or by Venmo-ing me at “chris-boeskool.” You can also BECOME A PATRON… It’s easy and fun. Otherwise, please follow me on Twitter and on Facebook for more fun.

Press on,

Chris

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